Today, I woke up extremely early, 11am, because I went to bed at like 5am.  Anyhow, I thought that by waking up early I could get some household things done like mow the lawn.

The weather was mostly dry this august and so I never had to mow the lawn as the lawn was yellow and ugly.  Now that we’ve got a bit of rain, it’s grown up again.  So, it’s time to mow the lawn.

Well, this was all going very well until I reached the backyard and the stinky fish of ignorance slapped me in the face.

So there I am walking around the backyard, pushing my lawnmower enjoying the sunshine and the heat and the flying insects …  Ignorance strikes when suddenly it feels like I stuck my ankle against the hot muffler on a motorcycle.  My mind instantly thinks that I’m being burned when reason kicks me back in the face again I realize that there no way I could be getting burned.  Then it hits me… BEE STING!

Ouch ouch fuck, goddam it, sonofabitch, fuck that hurts… then another on my other leg on my thigh and this time I actually see the bee hunched over pumping it’s venom through my shorts and into my leg.  Fucking shit that hurts!  I run like a little bitch from the backyard to the front, flick that little bitch off my shorts and run inside the house.

So, once I’m convinced I’m bee-free, I go back outside and explore my backyard, carefully.  I find not one nest but two and possibly more.  Both underground nests while one is at the base of a dead tree.  I seen swarms of bees going in and out each of these nests.  My lawnmower was between both nests.  I did, moving slowly, retrieve my lawnmower and decided that the backyard can wait to be mowed until next year.

Yep, that’s the end of the story, true as it gets.  One more thing:


Just wanted to make the reader aware of the slight oddness of this occurance.  The last time this happened to me I was no older than 10 years old.  I was stung twice by bees that were nested at the stump of a dead tree in my backyard.  My best friend Tim and I were playing around the nest and I got hit… sucks.

First time I got stung, I was playing wiffleball with the bee’s flying in and out of a nest at the front of my house. 😉  Teach those bastards to mess with me.  I’ll never forget that spot because after I got stung there, my dad cut the end off of a calking tube and shoved it into the hole.  I believe that even to this day that remnant is still stuck there.


~ by aeroslin on September 6, 2007.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: